Relinquishing Control (as a Disabled Christian)

Hi, friends. Ever heard the saying “if you want it done right, you have to do it yourself?” While most people wish they could control everything, Christians know that even when we create the illusion of control, God is still the creator and the judge.

Relinquishing control is hard enough for a “normal” person. But what if you depended on others for more things than not…for most things, in fact? As a handicapped person, I’ve progressively relinquished more and more control, and now, I rely on my family, boyfriend, etc. for almost everything. [I love and appreciate them dearly.]

Luckily, I have a big brain, and I can control what happens in it. I can read the books I want, maintain a blog about things I like, and grow in my personal faith journey. And though I can’t control my condition, I can fight to maintain some abilities via exercise, and I can decide whether to be bitter or inspiring as a wheelchair user.

What I can’t control is primarily physical. I can’t go home alone because someone needs to help me up the stairs. My coworkers help me get in and out of the building. I can’t take all the classes I want because I can’t get from point A to point B in X minutes.

That’s rough enough, but it’s the constant minutiae that grates on me worse. Let’s say I asked someone to get X out of my car, but they return and say it’s not there. Is it not in there? Or did they not really look? And that’s when I mourn my lack of independence. If I could just walk outside or downstairs to my car and look myself…so simple but such an ordeal. Many moments like that occur daily.

One thing we can all control is our acceptance or rejection of God. Whether you’re a king, a slave, a handicapped person, or somewhere in the middle, no man (or illness) can take away your salvation because it is God’s free gift. Salvation is more important and more contenting than anything…even the ability to walk. Love the Lord and love your neighbor because God is love! As for the rest of it…

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV)

Thanks for reading!

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